The Inconvenience of Cell Phones

Published on November 8, 2005 By HC1240 In Misc

Thanks to Ted for the spark that ignited this contemplation... Link

I've come to despise the effect communication technology has on my life.

Do I own a cell phone? Yes. I have one. Hubby has one. Teenaged daughter has one (and is not allowed to drive the car without having it charged and on her person). It has come in handy when I am out and have forgotten what I needed to pick up at the grocer's... and when I'm sitting on the side of the road because my car battery died.

I realized several months ago, however, how this technological "advancement" was affecting my relationships. Being a type A personality, I can't do just one thing at a time. Often, once I'm in the car and on the road, I use the time driving to catch up on phonecalls I need to return (hands-free, of course). One night in particular, the point was driven home to me (no pun intended). My daughter and I got into the car to drive home from a meeting and I immediately dialed my husband's number. She sighed and commented, "We're not even MOVING yet and you're on the phone?" It dawned on me then just what my cell phone use was saying to her. It said, "You're not important to me. I have better things to do than spend this time talking with YOU." Ouch.

I've also experienced this from the other side of the coin. Riding to a doctor's appointment with my husband last week, I found myself irritated because the entire time he had service, he was on the phone. I discovered firsthand what my daughter feels like when I do the same to her... second-rate, inconsequential, not worthy of speaking with.

Communication technology promises that we will be more connected with others... yet it really fragments my conversation. Meaningful relationships are reduced to snippets of interrupted chats and hurried email messages. Each is interrupted by the next call... message... etc.

My relationship with God also suffers from this constant barrage of intrusions. In a less tech-savvy time, I could easily spend an hour or more in thoughtful meditation and prayer. Now I find myself less than able to give God my undivided attention. The phone rings and rather than let it go... I answer it. Or spend the next twenty minutes wondering who it was, completely distracted from what I set out to be doing. "Shut the ringer off," you say. Yes... but what if one of the children needs me? What if there's been a hangup with that motherboard we ordered and it's not coming in? Easier said than done.

With each day I find myself more and more exhausted from trying to keep up with the demands of my cell phone and email account. I think the root of the problem is my desire to be in control. Maybe I don't trust God to handle the details of life, and I need to make sure I'm available to take care of it all. My need to be "in touch" constantly also says to me that my priorities are a mess. I can't decide what's most important, so I try to do everything at once. Sometimes I feel like a mouse spinning on a wheel.

I am not saying that cell phones are evil. I'm saying that I need to learn how to put technology into its proper place in my life... figure out a way to live with it, without losing my sanity or sacrificing things that I don't want to give up. I need to find a way to create space for my soul... I want to give my family my undivided attention so that they know without a doubt they are the most important people in my life. I want to spend quality time with my friends, looking into their eyes and drinking in every word they have to say, rather than piecing together their words in between static-filled patches of blanked out cell service. I want to take a time-out to read God's Word in silence, without the multitude of distractions that crowd in, threatening to lure my attention away. I want it to be quiet enough to hear His voice.

So if you call and get the machine... leave a message. I'll get back to you when I have time to give YOU my undivided attention. You are worth nothing less.

Comments (Page 2)

HC1240

on Dec 09, 2005

(((((((((((((((daughter)))))))))))))))))) I love you too

doctordoctor

on Dec 09, 2005

I totally relate to your experience with technology. I'm often left simultaneously loving the conveniences of current technology and wishing that we lived in a time like "little house on the prairie" and there wasn't any technological gadgets to distract us from the truly important things/people in life.

I find that often the time I set aside to be with the people I love, to relax or to sit quietly and pray or read the bible gets eaten up by my cell phone.

Good luck with setting your cellphone aside! I think often just noticing things like this is the biggest issue. It is cool that your daughter could tell you that it wasn't cool with her and you care about her more than you care about technology. It sounds like you have a really great relationship!

HC1240

on Dec 12, 2005

I'm often left simultaneously loving the conveniences of current technology and wishing that we lived in a time like "little house on the prairie" and there wasn't any technological gadgets to distract us from the truly important things/people in life.

Me too!!

It is cool that your daughter could tell you that it wasn't cool with her and you care about her more than you care about technology. It sounds like you have a really great relationship!

We have the normal parent-teen struggles that every family has, but on the whole.... I'm blessed beyond measure. She is a GREAT kid with a good head on her shoulders. Fortunately, she is completely different than I was as an adolescent. She's a sweet, sweet girl with a heart to know God. I just shake my head in wonder and thank God for giving her to me.

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